Horrible...Far From It

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation. What is called resignation is confirmed desperation,” once wrote Henry David Thoreau. A cathartic, existential piece of literature and philosophy that has inspired us to reexamine and reprioritize our lives, this expression could have no better place in modern society than in the daily grind of the work world. For some, a job is a source of joy and fulfillment, but for others, it’s a grueling endeavor that we partake in only to avoid eating dirt. Just ask Nick Hendricks (Jason Bateman), Dale Arbus (Charlie Day), and Kurt Buckman (Jason Sudeikis) of Horrible Bosses, Seth Gordon’s raunchy new summer comedy. I’m sure they would agree.

For these three stooges, calling their employers tyrannical monsters would be an understatement. Nick’s boss, Dave Harken (Kevin Spacey) is a condescending, self-absorbed despot, Dale’s boss, Dr. Julia Harris, D.D.S. (Jennifer Aniston) is a manipulative, foul-mouthed nymphomaniac who harasses her engaged employee to sleep with her under threat of blackmail, and Kurt’s new boss, Bobby Pellitt (Colin Farrell), is an indifferent and abrasive, coke-snorting kung-fu-lover who, in the words of George Costanza, “fires people like it’s a bodily function.” With the help of a few drinks and the dubious “murder advice” of ex-con, Dean (12-letter expletive) Jones (Jamie Foxx), the three friends decide to swap and then snuff their respective employers.  Lacking the intelligence or decisiveness to pull off such a heinous crime, though, therein lies the conflict and hilarity of the story.

Paying homage to films such as Mike Judge’s 1998 cult classic, Office Space (which Jennifer Aniston also coincidentally starred in) and all of the bawdy entourage comedies, such as The Hangover (2009) and Bridesmaids (2011), of recent years, Horrible Bosses is far from perfect. The story is not quite as fresh I hoped it would be, the ending feels rushed, and the frank dialogue, digressive ad-libbing, and scatological humor that I abhorred in The Hangover prevented this movie from reaching its full, knee-slapping potential. Nevertheless, the fluid chemistry between Bateman, Day, Sudeikis, and the rest of the cast made this film work. Horrible Bosses has a definite, cartoonish flair to it, and the movie is filled with sharp, spontaneous jokes. It definitely helps that Aniston stepped out of her typical “sweet girl” role for a film like this and Spacey continued in the footsteps of his roles in Glengarry Glen Ross (1992) and Swimming With Sharks (1994). Moreover, in the likeness of darker crime films, such as Fargo (1996) and Before The Devil Knows You’re Dead (2007), the movie also greatly benefits from its “seemingly failsafe scheme gone-wrong” premise.

What are you in for with Horrible Bosses: a few cat jokes, a running gag about a sex-offender who urinated on a playground at night (“when no kids were around”), and Jennifer Aniston talking real, real dirty (of course to give away any more jokes would be to spoil the movie). If this sounds stupid, bear in mind, it is. That being said, the deliveries and shining performances of all actors involved (including a cameo by Donald Sutherland) overshadow any of the film’s flaws. With a spirited cast, an amusing premise, and a few hard-laugh-worthy jokes, Horrible Bosses won’t have you killing your own employer, but it will have you laughing at them. I give this film a 7/10. 

My Five Worst Films

To compliment my 10 favorite films, here are my 5 worst. I'm sure you're wondering why 5 (instead of 10). The reason is because I'm usually very careful about choosing films, but here and there some films will strike a bad chord with me. These films aren't simply movies I just didn't prefer or care for too much. These films really made me angry, or they were boring and/or overrated

Also, I will not go into as much depth as I did with the 10 Favorites because, well, these films aren't worth that much time and energy of mine.

1) The Hangover- forced, lazy, and uncreative, obnoxiously unfunny, predictable gross-out jokes. I'm not one of those people that only prefers pedantic, high-brow humor. I like a lot of "stupid" comedies, but this wasn't one of them. The jokes ran flat, the soundtrack was terrible, and, I'm sorry, but "shock" nudity, characters singing out of tune,  running gags about "fake doctors," and people screeching, spiritedly dropping the f-bomb, and wavering about in a desperate attempt for laughs is NOT humorous in any way, shape, or form.
2) Big Lebowski- Obnoxious? Not entirely. Some of the cult-classic expressions from this film are pretty irritating, but more than anything else, though, this movie is just simply overrated. The jokes are convoluted and pretentious, and the story is incoherent, unentertaining, and what I like to describe as "pseudo-avante garde." Also, none of the characters are that sympathetic (especially John Goodman's loud and abrasive character). I've enjoyed several of the Cohen Brothers' films (Fargo, No Country For Old Men, and True Grit, just to name a few), but this is definitely not one of them.
3) The Girl Next Door- as a male viewer, I find it completely insulting when Hollywood assumes that as long as a film caters to your libido, you'll like it. Case in point- The Girl Next Door, a poorly-produced high school comedy. Is the story predictable and stale? I wouldn't go as far as to say that, but the characters are neither sympathetic nor believable, the jokes, references and scenarios are cliched, and the acting is sub-par.
4) Mallrats- Boring, uneventful, and obnoxious, this film by Kevin Smith looks like it was filmed in a weekend.
5) Man Bites Dog- this French film, a gruesome satire on the effects of television violence on society, is painfully unentertaining and gross. It's like watching one of the Saw or Hostel films, except there's absolutely no pay off. What's more infuriating about this film is that it tries to copycat Stanley Kubrick's A Clockwork Orange with its level of gratuity and "shock." Pretentious would be an understatement for this film. Boring would be another useful adjective.

Off To A Good Start

Love, love, love, love, love. Yes, we get it! This timeless, seemingly enigmatic concept that has permeated every nook and cranny of human culture since the days of the Neolithic Revolution, continues to leave its hackneyed mark on the modern world of today. However, in the field of independent films, Beginners (2011), a new comedy-drama by director Mike Mills, explores our favorite L-word, as well as the issues of vulnerability and self-doubt, liminality, and loneliness, in its own unique way.  

The story follows the life of Oliver (Ewan McGregor), a doleful graphic designer who makes an attempt at forming a serious relationship with Anna (Melanie Laurent), a quirky, itinerant actress, after recently coming to terms with two shocking revelations: the first being that his 75-year old father, Hal (Christopher Plummer), has come out of the closet and taken a younger lover, Andy (Goran Visnjic), and the second being that his father has been diagnosed with stage-four cancer. Frequently skipping about through time, the movie begins with Oliver cleaning out his recently-deceased father's bungalow, emptying out his pills, consolidating his personal belongings, and taking his Jack Russell terrier home with him....a poignant moment for anyone who has ever gone through the grieving process themselves. 

However, the film, while filled with lugubrious moments (such as the one above), it not entirely morose.  It is also whimsical and funny, and for starters, the humorous moments in which Arthur, the cute little pooch who is taken everywhere, coddled, kissed, and loved by everyone, telepathically communicates with Oliver (through subtitles) will warmly amuse many viewers-- not to mention pet/animal lovers. There is also a scene in which two characters roller-skate through a hotel lobby, reminiscent of the lightheartedness of a Charlie Chaplin film. By that same token, the film benefits from extraordinarily sharp writing. During one scene in which Anna and Oliver look out from their hotel room to another building across from them, Anna remarks, "Half the people live with the feeling of not knowing whether or not things will turn out for them. The other half relies on magic." Similarly, there is a flashback scene in which Oliver's mother (Mary Page Keller) explains what therapeutic catharsis is to her son, whom she whittles the day away with by playing games and attending art museums, and then tells him to go into his room and scream as loud as he can to demonstrate the latter. When he opens the door and reveals to her that he doesn't feel like screaming, she facetiously answers, "You will." Short, simple, and penetrating, acutely honest observations like these that give the movie its flair. 

What's also particularly effective and intriguing are the many instances in the movie in which barrages of still photos, accompanied by Ewan McGregor's forthright, expository narration, flash up on the screen. Displaying everything from presidential portraits to vintage, pop art-style advertising and telescopic images of space, these montages compare the frivolous, yet at the same time significant, cultural details and relics of the modern day (2003) with the recent past (1950s). A creative, authentic and surprisingly useful tactic for this story, Mills seems to be impressing upon us viewers the redolent message that, despite what occurs around us in the external world, certain facets of human experience don't change, and one of those facets is our relationships with other people (or in the case of this movie, people and pets).  

The film is not perfect, and may strike many as being too quiet, too quirky, or too sentimental. However, for what it's worth, it is as pleasantly original, movingly entertaining, and sweet as independent films about love are going to get. I guess you could call it "Beginners' Luck." I give it a 7/10.  

10 Favorite Movie Animals

The best "actors/actresses" in Hollywood because they don't ever have to act. They also don't require makeup sessions or paychecks.

1) The tiger from the Hangover (a movie I otherwise hated)
2) Verdell, the small dog from As Good As It Gets 
3) Arthur, the Jack Russell from Beginners 
4) Samantha, the German shepherd from I Am Legend 
5) Shadow, Sassy, and Chance, the Himalayan (cat), Boxer (dog), and Golden Retriever (dog)-- respectively-- from Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey 
6) Emma, the snake from Lady Eve 
7) Marley, the yellow labrador from Marley and Me 
8) The whale from Free Willy  
9) Beethoven, the eponymous Bernese Mountain Dog from the Beethoven series
10) The dolphin from Flipper